JANUARY 29, 2014
Why
Why don’t the doctors believe I can do it, maybe this isn’t the right decision for me.
Can I really do this on my own.
Of course I can, damn them.
56 already lost, that’s 20% there, all without what they suggest.
I have the support, I have the will and I’m developing the skills.
If that scientist can wait his whole life for that pitch to drop, than I can dedicate the next two years of my life to the journey. I will peal off that suit I’m wearing, maybe as slow as pitch, but it will happen.
FEBRUARY 1, 2014
Inspiration
“Leave a bite on your place to prove you control the food and it does not control you.”
In practice, we’ve done this a few times but it’s proving a little tougher than thought.
56 lbs down
I have developed arm flap folks
Inspiration
Eat the best food first, not save the best for last. This way your don’t eat the extra calories to get to the good part.
A Goal
The current short term goal:
Reach 399,
according to MFP, just under five weeks to go.
Visualize
One day I will step on that scale and I will see “199.” It will take two years but it will happen.
Yes it will damnit.
FEBRUARY 7, 2014
Wow, that’s only three weeks away. HOLY CRAP
FEBRUARY 8, 2014
Sugar Free Alternatives
It’s a real shame that it takes so much work to find the healthy alternatives in the stores. Hubby went to two different stores to find Voortman sugar free cookies, the first guys have discontinued them and the second had never even heard of them.
No wonder we’ve becoming such an obese generation.
Image how much things would change if the healthy alternatives were right there in the same isle. Holy crap, maybe we’d start making healthy choices.
I’m guessing the sugar/fat industry would have a lot to say about that.
FEBRUARY 12, 2014
A small change in attitude
Used to be I would wait for the next bus if it was getting close to the stop instead of walking faster to get there. The last two days I made a point of stepping up the pace to catch the bus that was getting close to the stop. It’s the little victories that keep the journey going.
FEBRUARY 14, 2014
Gonna need a new belt
When I bought that belt it barely fit, using the last whole. Yesterday I could only use the last whole but this time on the other end. If I loose any more weight gonna need to buy a new belt.
Less than 2 Weeks
Starting to feel a little stress now. Poor Hubby has to deal with my craziness. Love you hubby. Happy Valentines day. No chocolate this year, definitely a change. I’m not all that upset about the lack of chocolate. 399 is so close that I can certainly survive one Valentines day without sugar.
One step forward.
FEBRUARY 15, 2014
A Happy Walk
Went out for a little stroll with Hubby tonight to get some coffer/water. Not a long walk but it sure felt great. Can’t remember the last time we did that (without serious complaining on my part) I think it warms his heart a little to go out and do things like that. I love you hubby, it’s just the beginning of our new adventure.
Having a skinny day today
Damn that feels good
FEBRUARY 24, 2014
399 bitches
Woohoo dropped down under 400 today. First major goal achieved. Next goal 100 lbs lost.
FEBRUARY 27, 2014
The Big Day
Well it’s finally arrived, t minus 3 hours. Excited to get going. Hubby more nervous than me. Things can only go up from here, well down actually. Good luck.
MARCH 3, 2014
Lucerna
It may be a protein shake, but it’s chocolate and damn does it taste good.
MARCH 5, 2014
Day 6 post op
Aside from the arms, things are going well. Stomach is treating me quite nice so far, at this point size is 1/2 cup less a scoop. Still on full fluids, trying baby food tomorrow, hehe. The baby spoons that Mom bought have been very helpful in keeping my bite size in check. Oatmeal goes down great, cottage cheese a little heavy and venturing into cream soups. Cream of chicken last night was heavenly had a slight pepper flavor, mmmm nummy. Still low on protein, up to about 50, will try to add more as the days go on, and get in 2 protein drinks a day. Takes all day to get through 1. Overall still no regrets, down 12 pounds the first week, 90 total.
Spent the day cleaning the closet with Mom, threw away a full garbage bag of clothes that no longer fit, some were a little tough. Goodbye my green sweater, you were a great work shirt but we just don’t fit each other any more.
One step at a time.
MARCH 8, 2014
Another day
A little more improvement, arm issue gone – feared that was never going to go away. Oops now I’ve got a leaky incision, might call doc on Monday see if he’s concerned.
A little low on energy today, having trouble getting up from a crouch. Could be losing some muscle mass.
Overall still no regrets.
MARCH 11, 2014
Holy Weight Loss B..man
Mid September 475
Feb 26/14 day before surgery 392
March 10/14 370 unbelievable
Still going to bed satisfied at night but not enough protein yet. Hope to do better with puréed stage. Should be starting that soon. Can’t wait to try puréed chicken.
Still no regrets
MARCH 15, 2014
Woohoo crackers and chicken
Introduced puréed chicken and crumbled cream crackers to the cream of chicken soup dinner last night. Was so damn good to have new flavors and TEXTURE that we’re doing it again tonight. May be jumping the gun on the puréed phase but no problems at all last night. Coming up next, mashed potatoes, ahhhhh drooll. Not to many things at a time.
MARCH 19, 2014
Wow
Found and ankle today, the swelling has gone down in my left leg it looks normal. The right lag has a little way to go. 110 lbs down, almost halfway there.
MARCH 29, 2014
115 pounds down
Unbelievable. 40 lbs the first month. Down to 5x from 6x. Substantially less pain walking/standing.
Started with soft foods today, had some leftover Simon pizza today for lunch. Was fantastic. Tried some aged cheddar today too, another success. Need to keep the portions low as I can not fathom eating the low fat cheese.
No more chewable multi vitamins, thank heavens. That is some fowl stuff
Going to try and replace the protein shakes with the protein bars.
Love my sleeve, no regrets
Back to work on Monday, sure enjoyed the time off. Thanks Hubby for all your help this past month
I still can’t fathom what things are going to look like a year from now, excited to go down from here.
APRIL 6, 2014
My Victories Wish List
Fly without a seatbelt extender.
Fear no bench at a restaurant
Shop at a regular store
Walk down the isle of the bus without people moving WAY over
Run the Broadway to 13th hill
Sit beside someone on a bus without touching
Fit into Simons too big clothes
Reach my goal weight of 200 lbs
Get and start riding a bike
Sit in armed chairs with room to spare.
APRIL 10, 2014
Non Scale Victories
Bras officially too big
Afraid of loosing work pants and flashing the office
Sat down in a chair with arms today and it didn’t painfully dig into the side of my legs. Woohoo
Go me, just keeps getting better and better.
APRIL 12, 2014
Hernia
Down to just one tape measure, that four inches bitches. Keep on rockin.
Pink
Looking hot in my new pink shirt, feeling awesome. Feels great to be a loser. Hehe.
MAY 1, 2014
7 Months
Back to the wellness centre today for my program. I have officially moved from the fat chairs into the regular people chairs. Love these NSV’s, no painful side leg digging today. Woohoo.
Goal this week: start doing the core body exercises, Sunday @ 2 and Wednesday @ 8.
MAY 30, 2014
Changes on the Bus
For the longest time I was so big, that that chance of someone sitting beside me was pretty much nil, even on a full bus. I’ve noticed that starting to change lately. On the way to class last night someone sat beside me and there was even room in between us. Not sure if I like ths or not, really got used to being able to keep the seat beside me to myself.
NSV # 2, my skinny clothes are now way too big. Need to go buy more clothes, feels fantastic.
MAY 31, 2014
Some New Threads
Starting to wrinkle
Wore the Canada sweater yesterday, thought it was a 5x. Turns out it was my first 3x. Love being a loser.
JUNE 1, 2014
Badminton
Bought some badminton rackets yesterday, actually excited to go out and try them. All I can say it who am I and what has happened to Michelle ?
JUNE 13, 2014
Strange Observation
Now that the roundness of my face has gone down, my ears look huge. Hehe
JUNE 5, 2014
Changing my Mindset
I’ve lost enough weight now physically (144 lbs) that I’m starting to not be the biggest one in the room anymore. The interesting thing is I can’t wrap my head around that. I’ve been the biggest person in most rooms for as long as I can remember that my mind hasn’t quite caught up to my new body size yet. I wonder if that will ever happen and if so when does that change, when does the switch get flipped.
Love being a loser!!!
JUNE 10, 2014
Holy Crap
Well that was four days of torture, warning TMI coming, after 4 days, three glasses of lax-a-day, one suppository and two enemas I finally took a massive dump tonight. Man did it feel good. Oh and two Motrins for the pain. DO NOT want to repeat this again, must try some over the counter regular medicine to keep me regular. And of course as I keep being told up my water and my fiber. These last four days are definitely incentive to get that right. Also, a special call out to hubby for going above and beyond in his husbandly duties this week. Love you and thanks.
JUNE 11, 2014
150 Lbs
Weighed in this morning and I’m now officially down 150 lbs, still unbelievable. Woohoo. Can’t believe I’m only 26 lbs away from being in the 2 hundreds, I honestly can not remember when I weighed so little, has to have been in my childhood. Makes me a little teary eyed thinking about it. I now weigh less than what it says on my driver’s licence, a number I’ve been fibbing for years.
I would do it again in a heartbeat, just have to get a handle on the constipation and all would be perfect.
Bye Bye Hair
Well it looks like we’ve started the hair loss phase, I’m not loosing extreme amounts but there is definitely more coming out when brushing these days. Was thin to start, hope I don’t lose too much.
JULY 24, 2014
Major NSV
On my way up to PG today for summer holidays and had to shed a couple of tears. First I can sit in the seat with the arm rests down. Secondly and the biggest one, I DID NOT NEED a seatbelt extension. Words are not enough to express how happy this makes my.
Just found one more thing, I can use the food tray, I don’t think I’ve ever been able to use that since I moved from PG. Good grief this is awesome.
Oh yeah and I was able to walk down the isle without turning sideways without bumping the seats with my hips.
JUNE 27, 2014
4 Month Surgiversary
Feeling great, a little tired and a little emotional but all is going good.
Its recently to come me that I’ve spent many a year defining myself by my weight, always the biggest person in the room. Now that I’ve lost 154 lbs, I’m starting to blend in the with the crowd and find I’m having a bit of a hard time dealing with the emotions of redefining who I am exactly. Will now focus on being wife, daughter and friend, not jus the fat chick that you know.
Only 20 more pounds to go until 299, it’s so close I can almost taste it. Can I remember being under 300 pounds ever, not at all. It has to be way back in my teens, just guessing here. We may have a small celebration that day, really hoping it happens up in PG so I can celebrate with Mom, Dad and Hubby.
Had my three month follow up with the surgeon last week (a little late) and he called me a bariatric well loss super star and suggeested that we do some plastic surgery at the same time we do the hernia repair, sometime around the one year mark we will start looking into this seriously. Have started a TFSA account to start saving.
Still not one regret in deciding to go ahead with my sleeve.
JULY 4, 2014
One Less Pill
Went to see the doc today as I had run out of some prescriptions and needed a refill, while there we checked my blood pressure, and it turns out that after not taking any losartan for a week my blood pressure reading was 90/60, a little low actually. So no more prescriptions for blood pressure medicine. Woohoo. Actually told me to add a little salt while cooking (yuck) to bring it back up a touch. Just loving this journey, onwards and downwards.
JULY 8, 2014
99 Pounds Left To Go
The fact that I only have 99 pounds to go has completely absconded with my mind. Totally un-freakin-believable.
JULY 13, 2014
Well well well
More progress made, now fitting into some 3x clothes. On the last hole of the new belt Mom bought me. Still can’t see how much smaller I am compared to what my head says. Always think people walking close to me on the streets are going to walk into me. 2.5 year smokiversary today, can’t believe all the changes Si and I have made. Feels great and only getting better.
JULY 24, 2014
Shopping with Mom
Out at Penningtons today with Mom again shopping for a couple of new shirts and a bra. Now down to a size 3x and even a 2x in one style. Bought a bra that’s a little snug, 42D, but shouldn’t be too long before it fits, pink and fancy.
JULY 29, 2014
Normal Store
Bought a pair of shorts and a t-shirt at Walmart today, Walmart Carl. Great feeling to buy off the rack at a regular store.
SEPTEMBER 4, 2014
A Victory
Last night was a struggle with food cravings. Just before bed I really really wanted a piece of toast and peanut butter. For the first time I can remember I was able to talk myself out of it and went to bed without that snack. Phew it was tough and I still wonder where the come from, was it a reaction to an emotion I didn’t understand, that time of the month? I hope that by not giving in to my inner child/fat chick that it might get a little easier next time.
OCTOBER 1, 2014
A Call
Those cookies at work will probably always call to me, today I choose not to answer that call.
Pics
Was wondering how big I was at my wedding, spent some time on Flickr tiday, not even close to what I am now. Totally amazing this process. I have to have been in my teens when I was this light. Don’t even remember these scale numbers. Don’t want to jinx anything but I am so close to a total loss of 200 lbs that I can taste it, currently 197.6. Wow.
OCTOBER 3, 2014
Another NSV
I was playing around in the ebay app today on my phone and discovered I had some saved searches in there from over the years, it felt great to be able to delete the silhouettes 6x ones. Not going back to the that size any time soon. Woohoo.
OCTOBER 6, 2014
Yet another NSV
Went to the movies with the Hubby this weekend, first time in a movie theatre since my surgery. If felt amazing to be able to sit down in the seats comfortably and not be squeezed or pinched anywhere. What a wonderful feeling, not only that my but my butt wasn’t sore within the first half hour of the movie. Woohoo for watching movies like a skinny person!!!!
Note: the old temptation to buy chocolate, candies and popcorn was quite strong but I prevailed and enjoyed the movie just as much, phew.
OCTOBER 15, 2014
200 Pounds
Well the weigh-in today finally game me the numbers to say that I’ve lost a total of 200 lbs. OMG. Hard to think that if you’d told me a year ago when I started this journey that I would have lost 200 lbs I would have smacked you and called you a liar. It’s amazing to think that I’ve lost close to half of myself. I don’t have a lot to say just happy on this journey and can’t wait to reach my goal and be the healthy person I never really thought I would ever be. Sqqueeee.
Actual lost – 201.2, 73.8 pounds to go.
NOVEMBER 4, 2014
Hair Loss
Well at 8 months out the hair loss has stopped, phew. Now to wait for it to start growing back. Can’t wait.
NOVEMBER 12, 2014
The Devils Weight
Stuck at another plateau for the last two weeks, unfortunately that number and is 266.6.
I know that it will get started again but it’s always hard when you’re in it.
Sigh.
DECEMBER 21, 2014
The Gap
A great NSV this weekend. My first clothing purchase at a real store. I got an XL shirt from the gap. This would be my first time in a non plus sized store since I was a child. I remember starting out at Penningtons pretty young.
A whole new world of shopping has opened up. Whew, a little overwhelming.
Current goal; to make 250 by the end of the year. Fingers crossed.